Every individual is wired to gravitate towards a certain set of desires. There are desires you are born with, which grow with you over time and then there are those which develop as you raise your level of awareness. As an individual, it is vital to understand what other people desire so that you are best positioned to tailor a response and action plan to meet or surpass those desires.
It is when you meet their desires that you are considered to have made a difference in their lives. It does not take rocket science to understand an individual. Simply check what the person desires, meet the desire and you will surely become their best friend.
1. Desire for leadership and influence
Everyone is born with genes that gravitate towards leadership. In any situation, a human being seeks to understand who the leader is. In other instances a human being has an inborn desire to just lead whether someone asks for it or not. With leaderships comes influence and that is the cry in most hearts. Personally, wherever you put me, I find myself taking a leadership role sometimes subconsciously. Why is that so? I would be fulfilling an innate desire to lead and be a person of influence.
2. Desire for achievement and recognition
People generally have a desire to be valued and taken seriously. There is an inborn quest for achievement which purchases the much needed recognition. No matter how much you thwart this desire, it remains strong. One may not achieve in academics but you may see them desire to achieve in sports. There is certainly at least one area in your life from where you derive recognition through high achievement. What is that one area? As for me, I am a natural high-achiever who detests underwhelming performances in whatever I do. I always have goals ahead of me which I aim to achieve. With each achievement comes recognition.
3. Desire for affirmation and encouragement
Human beings thrive on affirmation and encouragement to do greater things. Greatness can be ignited when there is a voice that gives the much awaited hope and encouragement. Do you desire to see other people around you rising in their performance? Just affirm them, show you believe in them, encourage them and watch. Personally if I am affirmed, I rise like a lion wanting to conquer the impossible. Even the motivator that I am also desires to be motivated by others from time to time.
4. Desire for power and authority
this is a desire to be seen to be in charge with everything under control. Power and leadership are different. There is an innate desire to control and manipulate situations or overrule the status quo. Authority exercised outside of proper channels becomes illegitimate. Mankind desires to be seen to be having the power to cause change and make things happen. There is nothing that beats the feeling of being given authority over a task or project. I am a friendly leader but I am also very firm and I take authority when I see situations getting out of hand.
5. Desire for success and significance
with this is the desire to be financially secure, wealthy and happy. People work and toil seeking success and a happy life. It does not come easy most of the time. It comes after repeated efforts to consistently produce results. This desire can be one of the most frustrating as it calls for the individual to put effort to bring it to pass. It is also terrible if you have a warped definition of success-centered around accumulation of things. You will see a lack of money as not being successful whereas you can have all the material resources in the world and lack peace, direction, purpose and happiness which are all critical for success.
6. Desire for networking and companionship
Mankind was not born for independence but for community. There is an inherent desire to always want to network with others and have mutually beneficial relationships. Relationships are more important than cash or education. They take you further than your imagination. The reason you develop your linguistic abilities in life is so that you commune with others, you understand those around you so as to better serve them and also place a demand on those serving you. That is a desire for community and social networking. The success of social media platforms in our generation is a testament to the fact that networking is in all of us in varying proportions.
7. Desire for knowledge and wisdom
This refers to the enriching of the mind. Every mind desires to know and store more. Wisdom is the detonation engine for ignorance. Everyone has a desire to always explore more. Sadly some sit on this desire and stagnation settles in leading to boredom, depression and in some cases loss of life. As you grow physically, your mind always desires to accumulate more information. Unfortunately with this desire comes the accumulation of junk which is sometimes hard to let go as it then ferments into your character.